Preparing for the 1st Visit To Your Mom's Burial Site
Preparing for the 1st Visit To Your Mom's Burial Site
As Mother's Day approaches, the ache of missing our mothers intensifies for many of us who have lost our mothers. It's a day filled with bittersweet memories, longing for their presence and grappling with the reality of their absence.
The journey can be particularly daunting for those embarking on their first Mother's Day without their moms. Yet, there's an opportunity to honor and connect with our beloved mothers in a profound way by visiting their burial sites.
When I visit my Mother's burial site, I find comfort and a deep sense of connection. Refreshing her flowers and spending time in quiet reflection bring me peace and comfort. It's as if her spirit surrounds me, enveloping me in love and light.
If you're planning to visit your Mother's burial site this Mother's Day, here are some strategies to help you navigate this potentially difficult journey while amplifying the beauty of honoring your Mother:
1. Mood Check: Before embarking on your trip, take a moment to notice your mood. Are you seeking solace, comfort, or spiritual rejuvenation? Acknowledge your emotions and allow yourself to experience them fully.
2. Company: Consider whether you want to visit alone or with supportive companions. If it's your first visit since the funeral, having a trusted friend or family member by your side can provide much-needed comfort.
3. Portable Chair: Bring a portable chair to make your visit more comfortable. Choose something small and discreet that won't disturb the serenity of the burial site.
4. Flowers: Honor your Mother's memory with a bouquet of fresh flowers and some artificial ones. While real flowers may wilt, artificial ones ensure the site remains beautiful between visits.
5. Colorful Decor: Brighten up the burial site with colorful, weather-resistant decorations that make it easy to identify.
6. Activities: Engage in activities that your Mother enjoyed. Whether reading her favorite book, playing her favorite music, or simply reminiscing about happy memories, these actions can help you feel closer to her.
7. Snacks and Refreshments: Bring some of your favorite snacks and perhaps even a bottle of champagne to toast your Mother's memory.
8. Sunshades: Wear sunglasses to shield yourself from the sun, allowing you to relax and connect with your Mother's spirit under the open sky.
9. Updates: Share the latest news with your Mother, even if she's no longer physically present. It's a way to keep her memory alive and involve her in your life.
10. Cleaning Supplies: Bring a small brush and cloth to tidy up your Mother's burial plaque, ensuring it remains pristine and dignified.
11. Reflect: Take the time to immerse yourself in the present moment, soaking in the sights, sounds, and sensations around you. Reflect on the love and legacy your Mother left behind and her impact on your life.
12. Commitment: Commit to returning to the burial site regularly and observing how your mood and emotions evolve. With each visit, may you feel a more profound sense of connection, love, and light surrounding you.
As you embark on this journey to honor your Mother's memory, remember you're not alone. Countless others are walking a similar path, seeking comfort and connection amid grief.
May this Mother's Day be a time of remembrance, reflection, and healing as you honor the remarkable woman who shaped your life in countless ways.
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Kinyatta E. Gray is a Certified Master Coach, Grief Educator, Author, and Founder of The Heart of Miss Bee, Inc. Gray writes about grief and loss for women grieving the loss of their mothers. The Heart of Miss Bee, Inc. exists to honor the memory of the late Beverly E. Carroll, Kinyatta's Mother.